Do I have to attend Church?  (Kevin Dustow)

My Christian DNA has told me that I must attend Church. Every Sunday my parents would take us children there. The first attendance was 9.30am on Sunday morning. That was Sunday school. We then came home at 10.30am and went to the morning service at 11am. (our home was a very short walk to the Church.) We would finish about 12.30 and return home. Sunday was the “Lords Day” so we had to treat it as such. At 7pm we would go to the “Gospel Meeting” finishing at 8pm. Tuesday night was the “prayer meeting.” That was my upbringing. If you missed “church” you felt like a real “sinner.” When I was a teenager, I told my father one Tuesday night that I did not want to go to the prayer meeting. I got the guilt answer “well it is between you and the Lord.” I went. This was my DNA. As I and my siblings grew older our parents did not force us to go to “church” but if we suggested we did not want to go it was met with disapproval.

Over the years I have been involved in pastoring churches, in leadership, and travelling preaching. I have seen many “churches” some good and some questionable. I have seen what happens behind the scenes both good and bad but most importantly I have experienced both of these personally and this has questioned my view of “churches”. I have been shunned by Christians, some of whom were my best friends at the time. I have been told to leave  several churches, I have been threatened and abused by several churches. I am not writing this for sympathy because God has overruled and I am happy now. There are still churches where I preach who accept me. My ministry has not diminished. I was not put out of two churches because of sin, just in case some of you are wondering, but one was because I came into the revelation that the gifts of the Spirit are real and the second one was because the church was becoming a cult and after discussing it with the leadership I was told to go. It has soured and hurt me and had me question whether going to church is important as I was told in my younger days. I know that if a Church is guided by the Holy Spirit, it can be the most beautiful thing, but if it isn’t then it should be avoided. The Church you may be going to could be fantastic for you so keep on going, but I know of others who feel dissatisfied and hurt and do not want to go near the place; for self-protection. There are churches I have been involved in that have felt like “home.” I have felt uplifted. There are others where I go into them feeling down and come out feeling worse.

This caused me to study what the early Church was like. I wanted to see how a Church should operate. I had been told and in fact personally preached on Hebrews 10v25 “Do not forsake the assembling of yourselves together.”( I will look into this fully in the next blog) This verse was engraved into my very being that I must attend Church but after experiencing the lack of love, the lack of forgiveness, no desire to restore, the abuse of power by those in leadership, the judging by those who do not know the real facts, the rejections, I question myself and ask “do I want to associate with this kind of group?

Many Christians are struggling with these questions. They want love but only find it in the first three weeks of attending a church then are ignored. They want to feel forgiveness but attend a church and feel condemned. They have lost their trust in their fellow believers. They want to know more of God and are like a deer searching after water as David described in the Psalms and don’t get anything. Most sermons (not all) are just spiritual snacks rather than the meat of Gods word. People come away from church feeling empty yet they get this verse thrown in their faces that “attending Church” is essential for their spiritual growth.  Please hear my heart This is not a criticism but my journey, experience and observation. If you like where you are that is great, but there are many struggling like me to find the consistency of what church should be.

I have been hurt by the church so why would I put myself in the place of being hurt again? I have been rejected by many Christians over what I would call minor things so why would I put myself in that position again? I have begun to reestablish myself and now have some good Christian friends but still a tad weary of what could happen. I guess it is because I am not fully healed from the past and I thank these ones for having patience with me.

With all these things happening we must not let it affect our relationship with our father God.

What I believe God has shown me will be revealed in the next blog.